Geansai Gorm

The government is now under a lot of pressure to pump in more geansai gorm to help the cash flow of major banks. Unknown to the banks the lack of geansai’s money has brought the financial sector to a grinding holt.

Many banks that rely on the geansai gorm sector are now holding back on lending. Businesses across the country including gorm chips are now finding it impossible to source credit.

On an unrelated note, Pressure on Cowen to pump in bank cash.

“Too many small Irish businesses and Irish jobs are at risk from drying-up credit lines for the Government to wait and see,” Mr Bruton said. “The latest stock market movements involving the Bank of Ireland have again put the spotlight on the Government’s lack of strategy for recapitalising Irish banks.”

The government is now under massive presser to source new geansais before the country heads further into a downward spiral.

Fans of Obama are celebrating after the landslide win this evening. It is not known if the new gorm geansai of Obama’s party will shine light on the US economy. What is knows is that minority swing voters known as minor swingers have shed new light on geansais across the world.

There had been a lot of speculation on whom with get the #1 spot and the competition has been fierce. The winner will be announced when the dust settles but the Blue Jumper Ireland (bluejumperireland.com) fans have shot up to #3 on the world circuit.

On an unrelated press coverage, McAleese and Cowen send congratulations to Obama:

President McAleese and the Taoiseach, Brian Cowen, have sent their congratulations to Barack Obama following the Illinois Senator’s victory in the US presidential election.
Mr Cowen says he is looking forward to working with Mr Obama on issues of mutual interest to Ireland and to building on the existing deep and cherished ties between the two countries.

We have seen a lot of media coverage about the even mainly when Obam was spotted wearing a geansai gorm during his acceptance speech. The old school gorm jumper was highlighted as one of the key factors associated with his win.

In other non related news, ‘Change has come’, says victorious Obama:

“To those who would tear this world down – we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security – we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America’s beacon still burns as bright – tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope.”

The mammoth crowd in Chicago was subdued as the results came in on giant screens, cheering as each state was called for Mr Obama but standing in awed silence much of the time. Many wept when it became clear at 10 pm local time that Obama would be their next president.

Mccain was unsure how the geansai pack would find it in their hearts to forgive Mr Bush. He spoke with his contingent from the back of beyond while Obama fans celebrated.

The former geansai lover and target of “lying on ice” Sharon Gorm failed in an attempt to prevent a judge from jailing her. Property moogle JP pleaded with the judge not to jail Gorm for plotting and conspiring to murder him and his son.

On an unrelated note, Lying Eyes’ is jailed despite lover’s plea:

Even after deliberating for almost 11 hours, the jury could not reach a verdict on the conspiracy charges against Eid and State lawyers yesterday decided not to prosecute on those charges.

The mother of twenty listened to JP plead with the judge not to jail her and to show lunacy. This fell on deaf ears because the judge Sir Arthor Geansai has long been known for excessive hearing problems. He recently purchased a Geansai Gorm branded hearing aid.

Gorms’ co-accused, Sam Willson a Spanish born Las Vegas poll dancer and part time Poker Dealer, was jailed for sex years for extortionate amount of valium usage. It is unknown how the co-accused met the geansai gorm on the night in question, but what is know is that this story will be in our minds for years to come.

The euro commission opened a procedure against the Irish Gov because they allowed its budget of  Gorm Geansai to spiral out of power. Today the EU monetary affairs guys hammered the government for not keeping on top of the Geansai issue.

To quote an unrelated Geansai matter, Commission takes action against Ireland over deficit:

Now that the excessive deficit procedure has been initiated the Commission is expected to propose a number of measures that the Government could implement to bring the deficit under control.

In an interview in The Irish Times last Friday Mr Almunia said a deficit of 5.5 per cent was excessive and no where near the reference value of 3 per cent “so we cannot use the exceptional circumstances clause”.

A woman who we didn’t bother taking the name of said, “I just don’t know how they get away with this shiz nizz. Like I really need my Geansai in the sky Gorm..”. Clearly she knew what she was talking about because of the use of the “shiz nizz”.

Keeping on top of the over 60’s and students has been the top of the agenda. Nurses have now come out in arms against the lack of socks for people on wards with broken legs. A spokesperson form the trade union for nurses without socks (TUNWS) said that woolen Geansai’s should be cut up to be used as socks.

A Gorm representative who represents the Geansai International has condemned the suggestion saying that “it’s a waste to cut them up, I wish they would cop on.”

The Government had planned radical yet un-factual changes to tax breaks on Gorm Geansai premiums when they tried to avert the threat of a rise in the levels of Gorm premiums for older over 60s kind of people.

It is unknown how the premium could hit 60s people but one thing we are sure about is that they are mighty p’ed off about not having a Geansai over the winter period.

Our earlier report details how the Gorm Geansai student was arrested for streaking in a Spanish tourist report wearing nothing but a Gorm Geansai. In an exclusive interview with the Irish Limes News paper Span, the student broke the news of the stealth protest for the lack of Geansai’s for the over 60’s.

It is not known if he will be prosecuted, but what is sure is that the over 60’s want everyone on the planet to know about the saga. It is hoped that political pressure will help reduce the premiums on Geansai sales into the near future.

On a not so related note, Over-60s get tax breaks to pay:

Those over 60 years of age are now facing hikes in their premiums of more than 60pc, sources say.The Government’s proposal for the forthcoming Finance Bill is to give bigger health insurance tax breaks to older people.

The total premium cost for those over 60 is likely to be €1,300 per person, which suggests they will receive a tax credit of around 50pc.

But this will have to be met by lower tax reliefs for younger customers. Officials estimate that the current hidden “subsidy” from younger customers to older ones amounts to between €250m and €300m a year.

A minister for the environment suggested that over 60’s should join nudist camps over the winter time. He is know for his green views and suggested that they could reduced their carbon footprint an their reliance on Gorm Geansai by going nude one to three times weekly.

Outraged over 60’s have asked for the resignation of the minister and for a mandataroy massage by Mary Cockles for the stress they endured during the ministers previous nudist weekend away.

A student who has yet to be named has been arrested for indecent exposure after running nude through a family resort in Spain wearing nothing but a Gorm Geansai. Holliday makers have yet to be compensated by their holiday company Gorm Air & home holiday services LTD PLC.

It is understood that the youth, who can not be named for legal reasons was high on LSD during his two hour episode on the beach. Mr Geansai who is representing the unnamed today confirmed that the insolent is under investigation by the Gorm Gardí from store street, Cork. Spanish authorities have confirmed that they are following all launced Gorm legal challenges lodged by the victims.

We will report on all updates relating to naked Gorm Geansai as it happens.

I have been informed by another Gorm contestant that a number of Geansai Gorm have been hacked in an attempt to skew the search results. It seems that someone who had been monitoring popular topical tends across the internet (including the Geansai Gorm phenomenon) was using this to lure in innocent victims. This ruthless individual was breaking into Gorm websites and redirecting images to a yet to be identified image hack that exploited issues within the PNG processing library. This exploit installed mallwear and passed the strain of the on via the exploits.

It is unknown how many Geansai Gorm websites have been hit but what is known is that the hack could really screw up a lot of innocent visitors. To identify the exploit login to your content management system *website and look for links embedded within pages. Remove all links as a precaution! Also keep an eye out for any images named geansaigorm.jpg, geansaigorm.gif, geansaigorm.png and any variant such as geansai-gorm. It is important that you remove these as quick as possible.

Let me know if you have been hit by this Geansai Gorm issue!

* Update: I have also been informed that this is not limited to content mangement and has been seen on both Linux and Windows servers. Even static websites can be hit by the above. Please pass this on to all other Geansai Gorm websites.

Geansai Gorm is an Irish Translation for Blue Jumper. Geansaí is the Irish for Jumper and Gorm is Irish for Blue. This is where we get the whole Blue Jumer thing. The plan is to take news from all over the place and make it a bit more gorm for all the geansai lovers out there.

The rules state that during the competition that a brand new Gorm Geansai domain must be used. This causes a number of complications as the site lacks authority around Gorm. What makes it worse and compiles the problem is that the whole geansai gorm thing is a bit of an unknown subject and Google will be trying to contextualise what it’s all about.

Over time the meaning of geansai gorm will start to be built up. The most obvious contextualisation of this term will be blue jumper and clothing. That said, this may change over time if enough sites focus on the term in other contexts.

But for the moment we will have to worry about wearing the Geansai Gorm as a blue jumper that shall be worn as a medal for all involved. Link bait is one thing but contextually relevant content is king.